Cardinals Trade Carpenter for Feliz…

…just not the Carpenter you’re thinking of.

Pedro Feliz, seen utilizing his bat about as usefully as Felipe Lopez in the month of August.

“WE JUST TRADED CARP” my friend Lauren texted me before realizing the Cardinals did not, in fact, trade Chris Carpenter, but David Carpenter, a relief pitcher for Class A Palm Beach.

In exchange for Carpenter, the Astros sent 3B Pedro Feliz and cash. While I was hoping they’d go after Brandon Inge, Feliz should be an upgrade over the current situation at third.

Feliz has had a bit of a down year this year, hitting .221 with 4 HR and 31 RBI. His 162 game average for his career, however, is a .252 average with 18 HR and 76 RBI. He’s also a solid fielder. He’ll be an acceptable stopgap for the rest of the year.

Feliz was an integral part of the 2008 Philadelphia Phillies team that won the World Series. Interestingly, his name is translated as Happy Peter. If you accept that “peter” is occasionally used as a colloquialism for male genitalia, that means the Cardinals just acquired a happy…nevermind.

What David Carpenter may or may not look like.

Steve Kelley

Born in South Korea, Steve came to the US when he was three months old and has lived in St. Louis for the majority of his life. Of course, he naturally took a liking to the Cardinals, Blues, and thin-crust pizza. On the weekends, he can be found spending time with his friends, watching sports, or playing with his niece. Baseball, scotch, beer, guitar, softball, and drawing are among his many varied interests. Steve also has giant calves. E-mail: SteveK [at] ReviewSTL.com.