All Entries in the "Movie Reviews" Category
Machete
Based on the faux-preview shown inbetween “Planet Terror” and “Death Proof,” Robert Rodriguez’s “Machete” does exactly what it aims to do. Danny Trejo plays Machete, an ex-Federales with a huge machete that kicks a whole lot of ass. Enough Said. Machete (Danny Trejo) was the best Federale around. Known as a hero to his country, [...]
Takers
There is a part of me that believes heist films are just as much fantasy as space operas. In this day and age of forensic science, and increasingly great technology, the idea of a major heist going down successfully is pure fantasy. Most of the bank robberies we see reported in the news are small [...]
The American
The American is supposed to be a spy thriller, but unfortunately it is lacking the thrill. An assassin wants to give up the life while a priest wants to save him and a prostitute looks for a man to save her from her life. There are also two mysterious characters that want to buy a [...]
Going the Distance
“The only way you can ever be content is if you marry your best friend.” This line, perhaps the most profound sentence ever uttered by any actress who starred in ET and flashed David Letterman, is one of the more poignant lines of the film Going the Distance. Technically billed as a romantic comedy, the [...]
The Switch
Jason Bateman and Jennifer Aniston star The Switch, Hollywood’s latest attempt to revive the flagging romantic-comedy genre. With the exception of (500) Days of Summer, it is a formula that has been sorely lacking the last few years; relying increasing on wacky high-concept premises (“She’s the city’s first female firefighter; he’s an arsonist with a [...]
Nanny McPhee Returns
I went into Nanny McPhee Returns with a negative attitude. I will admit it. I never saw the first one because I thought it looked like a dumb, cheesy kid’s film. So I assumed this would be the same. Secondly, and more importantly, I was under the impression that Emma Thompson had declined to reprise [...]
Get Low
Set in 1930s, Get Low follows the story of Tennessee hermit, Felix Bush (Robert Duvall). Bush is a man feared by the nearby community because of his unseemly manner and mysterious past. Rumors fly around Felix, people whisper that he is a murderer, but in truth Felix harbors secrets about his past no one can [...]
Lottery Ticket
Lottery ticket is the story of Kevin, a kid that lives in the projects with his grandmother and works at Footlocker. The lottery has climbed to $370,000,000 dollars and everyone is excited about winning. Kevin is not. Kevin gets talked into playing the lottery with a friend he grew up with, Stacy. He picks numbers [...]
Vampires Suck
Vampires Suck Bites… But It Bites Like It Should. Remember the Three C’s: cheesy, campy, and cliché. This life-saving mnemonic will be your ultimate tool to turning this patience-draining parody into a survivable satire. The plot is mainly based on the first movie of the Twilight Saga. Gloomy Girl moves to Gloomy Place. Gloomy Girl [...]
Eat Pray Love
Julia Robert’s latest film, “Eat Pray Love,” is adapted from a best selling novel of the same name. While falling asleep when reading is usually considered acceptable with a book, it isn’t exactly the affect you want your movie to have on the audience. Unfortunately, this is that type of movie. Liz Gilbert (Julia Roberts) [...]
